There is no right or wrong. Rules don't matter. Being a "good" person makes no sense, if it's based on rules because that is only thinking about being "good", and there are no feelings involved.
Feelings are real, thinking is not. Feelings come from experiments, which we perform through trial and error. Theory, idea, experience, process, results. Repeat. There's a millions different ways, and a million different things, it never ends. And they are all valid, because they were real for you.
What is important is that you did it, you tried, you kept going.
What is important is how you feel.
There are only choices, that is life, it is what it is, it grows how it grows.
You are free to choose as you please.
How do you want to feel?
Self-satisfied. Strong. Self-reliant. Personal power from your own gut.
When you go to sleep at night watch for the pieces of you that are unresolved.
Pleasing others will only ensue guilt which is a useless emotion. What we all want, what we all long for, is for those unresolved pieces of us, to be fully realized.
It's a war, to work through the dragons of our mind, for the real bright gold.
That's the "work", that's what we all want and seek. "Doing the work" is an act of will, it's an act of courage, it's a challenge, each and every time.
You have to sneak up on it, bring out your big guns, and fight like hell.
Get the beast. Take pride in your gold. Love it for what's it worth and then sleep like baby.
The results are, through hard consistent work over time, self-realization.
Self-realization, that's what matters. Not pleasing others, not making rules, not being "good".
Self-realization. Taking down the beast in your own head, and doing your work. Every. Single. Day.